My heart was racing the entire day. My mind was a jumbled mass of anxiety filled thoughts, I could not focus on anything. Oliver was only three months old and helped keep me busy. But––I don’t think a minute went by that I didn’t check the clock. When it was finally time to pick Luke up I practically sprinted to the door. As soon as I saw him my anxiety vanished. No that’s a lie. But I did feel better having him back. I kept asking him how his first day of school was and he answered it was ok. Just ok? Did you meet a lot of new friends? What did you do all day? How were your teachers? He answered with one word replies and it about killed me. I realized I may have been a bit much to handle after he said that he would talk about it later.
It took a long time for me to be comfortable with him being in school. Luke had never been in daycare or any similar setting before and it was hard putting faith in other people––strangers really. Luke had some adjustment issues that we worked out and I too worked out my own issues. I soon realized (after I calmed down) what a great school he was in. They never seemed to push him to do anything he wasn’t ready for. They let him lead in terms of learning and that made all the difference (main reason why I chose a montessori).
Today was his first day of his last year of preschool. We dropped him off and he did not look back once. Come to think about it, I don’t think he even said goodbye to us. That is Luke though, he is a secure little guy. Last year after we dropped him off I cried uncontrollably and I admit, I did shed a tear today as well, but not for the same reasons.
He has grown so much over the last year. I didn’t realize it until today when I sat down and thought about who he was a year ago. I have to give credit to his school for a lot of his growth. They did an amazing job and I can not wait to see the impact they have on him this year. I too have grown as a parent. I now know how important it is to allow other people in––to guide and mold him into the man he will one day be…it really does take a village.