Middle school is said to be a confusing time in one’s life. It’s a mix of still being young and immature, but beginning to see things for what they really are. There are times my son behaves in a way I wonder if he’ll ever be able to take care of himself. Other times I’m on awe of his cautiousness in care and action. Sometimes I think I’m beginning to get in the groove of parenting in this weird time. Truly though, it is just as confusing for me as it is for him.

“I need you to help me get tucked in, mom! Can you scratch my back too?”

“Ugh, I just want to be left alone.”

Follow his lead, I tell myself. Soak up the moments he needs me and be proud of the moments he doesn’t. Give him more freedom but don’t forget strong boundaries. Easy, right? Not always.

As they say, some of the hardest things in life are the things that shape you the most. As far as parenting a middle-schooler goes, I’m being shaped just as much as he is. When I think about it, he’s always been shaping me. Being my first kid, he’s been the first to show me all the different stages. With his Ocular Albinism, he’s shown me vision is deeper than what the eyes can do. With his ADHD and Tourette’s he’s shown me what true resilence looks like.

It is like an unfinished painting that you didn’t even realize was unfinished. A few added strokes here and there continues to transforms it into something you’d never imagine it could be. I, of course, am that unfinished painting that has become who I never imagined I could be.

When Luke is older and thanks me for all I did for him, I too will thank him for all he did for me. For we are all unknown artists in others’ lives.